Archive for September, 2006

West Bank beer fest

Believe it or not, amid all the violence and unrest in the Middle East, a new microbrewery has managed to take root and even become popular enough to front a two-day festival high up in the hills of the West Bank. Screw the UN, if this place survives all the bombing and hardline anti-booze dogma going on around it, we’ll be spelling peace k-e-g-s-t-a-n-d.

Comment t’allez vous?

If you’re like me, you’ve been waiting for the chance to talk dirty to the Governor General ever since sexy Michaelle Jean took over the office a year ago. Well now’s your chance. To celebrate her one year anniversary as G-G, Jean launched Citizen Voices, a site that’s supposed to allow regular Canadians to “engage in a dialogue” on a number of important issues.

And while I did not see the abolition of booze tax or the outrageous cost of smokes listed among the discussion themes, I do see “Women” and “Culture”. Not a bad start, although things were pretty tame on launch day. Not for long. Log on and join my thread about Belinda Stronach empowering women through fornication with pro hockey players. Game on.

Andrew at Jay's Game

Went to the Blue Jays’ last home game last night. Fortunately they ended the season on a high note with a 5-0 win over the Red Sox — securing second spot in in their division. That’s right, we’re No. 2. Woot! We were sitting in the VIP Club section behind home plate which means we had delightful hostesses serving us beer and peanuts all night. Also Woot. Anyway, here’s my play-by-play:

Jays Highlights

Been nice knowing you…

Well, according to the Boston Herald, the only reason I started this damn blog is now unlikely to amount to anything. Gawker adds a bit more piss to the flame and even takes a jab at WordPress, my free blog app of choice.

To think that the well of book deals for us, the literary avant garde, has dried up before I even developped a consistent theme for this fine site. The sad part is that I just broke ground on the plot sturcture for a book I was planning on getting picked up called “The Ballad of Leroy Jenkins: A dungeon too far”.

Oh well. These three short weeks have been fun. Adios.

Here’s a funny clip of David Sedaris reading an essay he on the Stadium Pal external catheter self-urination system. I’ve seen ads for this thing, and I have to admist it struck me as a useful accesory for a beer hound like me. I’m over it now though.

Anwya, I also got tired of trying to find something to blog so I could test this new plugin and I stumbled across this just in time. Anyway,  check it out. I’m reading a book of his essays right now, and most of them are a lot like this. Definitely worth checking out.

Truth in advertising

Beer GirlFinally, a beer maker that uses honesty and real life logic to promote its crappy non-alcoholic brand. It’s simple, people shouldn’t drink non-alcoholic beer unless they’re pregnant. And also, pregnant women don’t necessarily like beer any less because of what’s cookin’ in the oven, so why should they be deprived of a safe, reasonable facsimile. Kudos to Nova Schin for providing this public service down in Brazil.

Sure, they’re also using sex to sell the “beer,” but again, at least they’re taking an honest approach. The girl’s totally hot…which explains the pregnant.

Click for a few more pics and a bunch of other pics from foreign ad campaigns.

New Sloan drops…

This should come as a surprise to no one, but Jay-Z has officially ended “the worst retirement in history.” Back in ’02 he said he wasen’t going to perform anymore, but it’s been tough to find a year since then when he hasen’t been involved in at least a couple of hits on the pop charts. Girlfriend Beyonce, Kanye West, Pharrell Williams and Linkin Park have all benefited from the Jigga Man’s Midas touch.

It’s all good though. It wouldn’t be any fun for me to take on the rap game without a worthy competitor in the biz. Watch yer butt Hovva.

CSI: Ghetto

You know sometimes when you wake up in the middle of the night thinking you heard something like a gun shot, or cop sirens or something? If you’re like me, you probably tell yourself you’re still drunk and to go back to sleep.

But then there are times when your neighbours house gets shot up. Man, I hate it when that happens.

Daily buzz kill

Isn’t she pretty in-toxicated
Beer and sloots were aplenty at Victoria Secret’s sorority -style keg party. But what’s with the Tims holding the trays of Tab? Total party foul.


Natural born a-holes
Perps busted after they ditch grand theft auto for grand theft beers. You got greedy boys. At least they weren’t drinking and driving.

Atilla the Hops pulls off heist
Who stole your beer? The fucking Pirates of the Carribean? Or was it that football team from Oakland? At least they left the retards safe and sound.