Archive for the ‘Porn Career’ Category

Telus offers pornCanada’s second largest wireless phone provider has started offering downloadable porn for subcribers with video-enabled phones. Telus says users can already view porn on their Internet-enabled hardware, so it doesn’t make a difference if they cut out the middle man and pimp it themselves.

The funny part is that the Telus spokesman admits they had to check Google to verify that there was a demand for porn among Internet and wireless users. I guess the web isn’t just for trading unicorn lore on newsgroups.sci.fi.love.i.believe.org anymore.

The idea of spicing up the morning commute with some hardcore sexy librarian action is almost enough to make me ditch Rogers — but it’s probably pretty pricey. Cross your fingers that your download doesn’t experience any premature termination.

I was eating some yogurt this morning — don’t ask, it was on sale asshole — and I was wondering what the arrow logo on the container was supposed to mean. It’s just this big arrow, pointing down. So I went to the yogurt web site to check it out. You can imagine my surprise when I realized that the yogurt is trying to get me to pleasure a lady for two weeks in a row. Consult the two slides from their advertisement pictured below:

yogurt.jpg

I’m game for anything, but unfortunately my time off is all gone for the year. But could it be that this actually part of some better living regimen? If so, I may be entitled to medical leave. Or maybe the creative department at Danon’s ad agency is run by 18-year-old horn dogs who managed to slip one by the boss.

Either way I appreciated stumbling upon this porn so early in the morning, intentional or otherwise. Too bad the yogurt tastes like ass.

Time for a career move

d70s-press.jpgNow that I’ve got a decent camera, it’s time to make the move to softcore porn photography. That’s right, I just picked up a Nikon D70s — my first digital SLR. I’m also trying out some awesome lenses which may also join the collection. It’s got a lot of buttons and menus that my little point-and-shoot doesn’t, but I’ll figure them out. I guess I really just need to find the one that makes the clothes come off.

In any case, I’ve been waiting for this opportunity for a while, and now that I have the right equipment, I think it’s time to start shooting the ladies. I’m going to get started this weekend. Hoefully, in a few months, I’ll be able to take shots of sloots who actually know they’re on camera. Woot!